Assalamualaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh,
Sisters, today I find myself addressing age old issues that will always be spoken of no matter what. This is because this topic is so detailed that it requires a huge amount of discussion amongst scholars as well among us.
Whats the topic, you say? Well let me begin first, with why I am writing about this. Today in class, we were moved around and I ended up being in a group full of boys. Somehow I always find myself in such situations. This brought me to think about how sisters everywhere that go to mixed colleges, schools, workplaces have to experience this! Which made me think (like I do) and it led me to write this post.
Well as I have made it pretty obvious the topic is freemixing or "socialising". But its not in a broad sense its inside the classroom/workplace. We know at some point we have to work with the opposite gender, but when does it start and when does it stop? By this I mean, how much "mixing" does there need to be?
I know some scholars say mixed colleges is abig no no. But its up to you ultimately.( I sincerely wished I had gone girls college) It has not been deemed haram but it's advisable to try and stay away from it because it can create alot of fitnah. If you do go to a mixed college or workplace I understand completely you do have to talk to guys.
Nobody is saying you need to become best buddies with every guy inorder to "socialise" or do your work because honestly thats not needed. I understand that it's difficult to draw boundaries but one way that might help is this. Think to yourself everytime you talk to a guy for work, 'are these personal questions that aren't related to the work?', 'did I need to mention that'?
Often freemixing or dating begins in the classroom because we are in concentrated areas day in day out, its natural feelings will develop. But what you need to remind yourself is that the classroom is for working not freemixing. Let us all questions our motives and actions and the necessity of what we do. You dont have to be on your guard all the time just bear in mind a few things and try not to get carried away InshaAllah.
Also sisters if you feel you have socialised too much with guys in the classroom/workplace just start slowly stopping inappropriate talk. Try to keep it work based only.
InshaAllah this was beneficial. I am not perfect so if I have offended you please forgive me. This is reminder to myself first then yous :)