I know it happens to all of us at some point; we get into a sort of funk that's hard to get out of. Sometimes in these kinda funks it's hard to want anything or do anything a while ago I read colourless tsukuru tazaki and in this book the character was essentially numb to living, he didn't want to live but simply continued, he kept up with his habits like laundry, swimming, cooking not because he wanted to or enjoyed it but because he knew he had to continue. Nowadays I can understand that in addition to a firm belief that whatever is now is not forever and to continue will only help me reach that 'better state of mind', however something surprised me. Usually in this sort of lack of lustre for life I have little to no enjoyment in most things but running seems to be strong despite this. Today I wanted to run, I had no reason I just enjoy it. And I'm damn glad I have something I want to do because slowly slowly I enjoy things less sometimes reading is even a chore. But soon that'll all change I'm sure. I know I've changed, my posts aren't as islamic anymore but that is life I'm afraid, this blog was never for anyone but myself first and foremost.
I'm tellin you , it's this world it does funny things t you , messes with yo head. And that's why you gotta find solace. Solace in God, fool! Don't be talking about no stay gram or cult. God is thee only one that gone help you out of your mess! Don't be kiddin' yoself thinkin' 'ahh Joseph gone come round' and help me outta' this rut' naw damn well he aint! only God gone be there when life gets drawn out thin, you think Joseph gone be there when you die, fool? Don't be living and dyin by yo friends, Listen to yo old grandpa, when he say I been living for a long time na, and I learnt the world makes you think funny old things, things you would never think before , things like I ain't pretty no more or that girl is betterr than me. Or my frend is my worl'. Things no sane person would think! You hear? Even Things like the colour of my skinn determines my worth naw you see? This world it messes you UP. It gets inside yo skin and dig...
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